Hog On Ice on what women want
Steve of Hog on Ice said some right-on things about women and premarital sex today.
And now, my own views on premarital sex (copied and pasted from the comment I made to Steve's post, and then expanded upon):
Premarital sex has screwed up every relationship I've been in, including my marriage. It's just shy of a month since I broke up with a wonderful, beautiful lady with whom I have a lot in common. The cause of our break-up? We started having sex. I swear, once we crossed the threshold of physical intimacy, the emotional barriers started building up. It's like we started to distrust each other in very subtle ways, and we drifted apart.
And this has happened in every romantic relationship I've been in. I may not always be the easiest student to get through to, but life experience has demonstrated a pattern to me, and that pattern suggests that having premarital sex is a wonderful way to kill relationships.
Call me crazy, but I'm going to try it the right way next time.
And by "right way" I mean God's way (you knew I couldn't finish this post without pissing off the athiests/agnostics). God told us not to have sex before marriage, and gee willikers! What do you know, it turns out to be the right way. It's almost like He made us, and knows what works and doesn't work when it comes to human relationships! Color me surprised.
As to why a Christian boy like me took so long to figure out that I should be doing it God's way, chalk it up to my thinking I knew better. You know, the usual problem with humanity.
And now, my own views on premarital sex (copied and pasted from the comment I made to Steve's post, and then expanded upon):
Premarital sex has screwed up every relationship I've been in, including my marriage. It's just shy of a month since I broke up with a wonderful, beautiful lady with whom I have a lot in common. The cause of our break-up? We started having sex. I swear, once we crossed the threshold of physical intimacy, the emotional barriers started building up. It's like we started to distrust each other in very subtle ways, and we drifted apart.
And this has happened in every romantic relationship I've been in. I may not always be the easiest student to get through to, but life experience has demonstrated a pattern to me, and that pattern suggests that having premarital sex is a wonderful way to kill relationships.
Call me crazy, but I'm going to try it the right way next time.
And by "right way" I mean God's way (you knew I couldn't finish this post without pissing off the athiests/agnostics). God told us not to have sex before marriage, and gee willikers! What do you know, it turns out to be the right way. It's almost like He made us, and knows what works and doesn't work when it comes to human relationships! Color me surprised.
As to why a Christian boy like me took so long to figure out that I should be doing it God's way, chalk it up to my thinking I knew better. You know, the usual problem with humanity.
4 Comments:
How do you know that this new found theory will work, you haven't tried it yet!
Well, even if it doesn't work, you split with everyone's self respect intact!
My wife and I were both virgins when we got married. We are both extremely happy with our choices! She was 22 years old and I was 23 when we got married. We had both had serious relationships before (I had a 2 year long relationship in my late teens) but we fought of pressure to compromise our values. We dated for 2 years and were engaged for 1 more, and we sometimes wondered why we should wait to have sex. We thought about our future children what we would want them to do. We wanted to have credibility when we ask our children to wait until they are married to have sex. Many Christians say not to have sex until marriage, but they didn't wait until they were married. Many people then say that their decision has caused them difficulties and that they wish that they had waited. We wanted to do it right and be able to tell people that it was worth it.
We are now enjoying a wonderful marriage and a wonderful sex life. Most of my friends say that sex after marriage just doesn't compare to what it was before. Ours was always great and gets better each day. It is also my observation (from talking to my other married guy friends) that my wife and I seem to have more and better sex than my married friends who had sex before marriage. I guess that we are making up for lost time. I would encourage anyone to follow God's design and hold off on the sex until united in the holy union of marriage.
Paul from Minneapolis, MN
Thanks for your comments, Paul. I can only hope for as much happiness in my next relationship. :o)
And as to "How do you know that this new found theory will work, you haven't tried it yet!", I've tried the same thing again and again and again and it just hasn't worked. It makes sense to me to try it a different way. Plus, it's the way prescribed in the Bible, which is a reliable source as far as I'm concerned. And there you have it.
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